Bruce Willis – 20 Years ago, after his breakup with Demi

October 1999 By Philip Berk

Fifteen years ago Bruce Willis beat out three thousand other actors for the starring role in Moonlighting. Overnight he became a sensation.

Since then he’s earned the wrath of critics (Bonfires of the Vanities), the praise of critics (Pulp Fiction) and the loyalty of millions of  moviegoers who consider him the one action hero worthy of that name.

Yet, in his current films, he’s anything but an action hero.

In The Sixth Sense he plays a child psychiatrist

And in The Story of Us he plays a father and husband trying to salvage a marriage.

Which sounds like The Story of Him.

After ten years of idyllic marriage to actress Demi Moore, which produced three beautiful daughters, Rumer, 11, Scout, 8, and Tallulah, 5, he surprised everybody by announcing their separation a year ago (June l998.) 

They are still not reconciled.

At his recent press conference he is less cocky than he used to be but equally good humored and more forthcoming than ever.

Although he won’t discuss the break up of his marriage, it is a subject he can’t avoid.

“Obviously,” he tells us at the junket, “it would be an interesting hook to write about, the parallel between The Story of Us and what happened in my personal life, but from last year forward, Demi and I have chosen not to discuss how we feel. There are very few things left in my life that I have the ability to keep private, and that is one of them.”

Did he have second thoughts about doing the movie? 

“I did have some concerns. Suffice to say the question came up, but I really wanted to get back into the romantic comedy genre. You get bored  playing the tough guy who finds himself in a difficult situation, has to extricate himself, and then does so heroically. Does that sound like Die Hard? You know how long ago that was!  

“I’ve done far too many of those. I’ve said yes too many times and needed to take a break from it. It’s far more difficult for me to be funny, to try to make you laugh, than it is to run down a street with a gun in my hand. Not that I won’t run down a street and shoot people, but I’m far more enjoying doing comedies and especially a romantic comedy with Michelle Pfeiffer and Rob Reiner. I’m a lot happier going to work when I know my job is to make you laugh rather than make you cry.”

The Sixth Sense does neither. It gives you chills.

The film has become a phenomenon.

Made for less than $30 million, it should gross over half a billion, which will make Bruce a very, very wealthy man. (Rather than take his usual salary — around $20 million — he settled for a percentage of the gross, which should earn him way in excess of that figure.)

Is he patting himself on the back for being so prescient?

“I knew it was going to be a good film, but I don’t think anyone had the foresight to see that people were going back three and four times to see it. That’s why it’s done so well. We were all worried that critics would figure it out. I didn’t figure it out when I read the script. I was completely surprised by the ending.”

Where does he see his career going in the new millennium?

“I don’t look at my work in terms of a career. Some actors do; I don’t.  My goal is to have an many different colors as I can, so what’s said about each individual film when it comes out , good or bad, is not as important to me as the body of work I will end up with.”

Would he like to direct?

“I would probably do okay as a director even though it’s a real hard job and it takes too long. It’s a more difficult task than anyone realizes. But so far I haven’t found a story I’d want to spend two years of my life on.” 

Is he looking forward to the Millennium?

“It’s already come and gone. It happened in the year 1976. But the truth is, it means nothing to me. It’s like a mileage odometer on your car, turning over and you go, ‘Ooh look, 2000 miles.’ There are a lot of people attaching significance to it. ‘It’s the Millennium so God’s coming.’ But it’s all nonsense.”

In one scene in The Story of Us, he’s reunited with his kids after being separated from them for the summer. Suddenly he gets very emotional.

Is he like that?

“Well sometimes more, sometimes less. I try to not be away from them for more than ten days at a time when I’m working, which means I sometimes have to travel great distances, but I just got to do it. There have been times when I’ve been away as much as three weeks. And when that happens, I suffer from separation anxiety. I miss them terribly even though I e-mail them everyday and and stay in contact.”

The movie claims love is a chemical reaction.

What’s his opinion?  

“I think it is. There is a fabulous book called The Moral Animal about that, about  what we in the 20th Century call love. We have assigned this value to it. Fidelity, monogamy, trust, loyalty, a lot of cerebral things, when in truth we are driven by our DNA map. Everybody on earth is driven by his DNA map, his genetic map, which doesn’t know it’s the 21st century. It could just as easily be 150,000 years ago when we were Neanderthals who didn’t know anything about menstrual cycles or when babies could be made. To put it bluntly, it was just fuck as much as you can, and a child will come. We are still driven by that map, that same genetic thing. For one simple reason. To get your genes onto the next generation so the species doesn’t die out. This brings Darwinian theory of Evolution into the 20th Century, and till somebody comes up with a better theory I’d have to agree with it.”

How does he feel about love and monogamy?

“What I felt about those things when I was twenty is different than what I felt when I was thirty, and it’s different now that I’m 44. It’ll be different when I’m fifty. So what I’m saying is: the more information you take in, the better you deal with your world. I’m suspicious of love based upon what I know about scientific principles, but I’m still susceptible to it, and won’t deny it. 

“But I don’t believe in the general success of long term monogamy. I do believe that life is a series of relationships that are based on love. But if you look at the facts, you’ll find that most people’s lives are a series of relationships, and they’re not  with one person all their life. There are exceptions, but I would venture to say most people stay together out of fear of change rather than anything else.”

And marriage?

“The concept of marriage has changed. A hundred years ago in the United States, marriage was a contract so the farmers and the pioneers who were moving west could breed children to help them work on the farms. People married without  having met each other. Still happens in the world today. Now in the 20th century we have assigned a lot of values to it, rules that govern marriage.”

Is he happy with that?

“It’s okay.”

Does he agree that in a marriage the wife is the designated driver and the husband paints the world the way he sees it?

“No one really knows what goes on behind the door of your or anyone’s house. That’s why we have curtains on windows. It’s why we wear clothes. No one really knows who’s the boss or not. I’m sure there are just as many examples of the man being the designated driver and the woman the kid at heart. I have a great deal of both in me. When I play with my children, when I’m having fun, I feel like a kid. I still feel very close to the kindness in me. But I am also very organized and ultra responsible when it comes to my children and their welfare. I’m even more organized than I’d like to be. I’m always thinking of the future. I hope for the best, but expect the worse.” 

As a parent, why is he against gun control?

“I believe in the Constitutional right to bear weapons,  to defend yourself against tyranny, against someone coming into your house and trying to kill you. But I am also in favor of parental control. What happened in Littleton, Colorado, those parents obviously didn’t know what was going on with their children. Anyone that allows someone to amass a cache of weapons in their home is not paying attention.” 

And violence in the media?

“A lot has been said about the impact of violence in films.  While we would all like to think of ourselves as human beings, we are simply at the top of the food chain. We are far closer to the animal kingdom than anyone would like to admit. I’m sure we’d all like to think that everyone on this planet has some connection with the concept of right and wrong, but there are many, many people who live their lives with no consideration of that. No one learns anything he’s not willing to learn or not ready to learn.  My criteria for acting in films is to entertain. The movie I appear in should  be interesting, watchable, and not be boring. Those are my only criteria. I’m not in the business of trying to teach people anything.” 

What moral lessons does he teach his children?

“I  teach them the difference between right and wrong. When they make a mistake, when they hurt someone, they have to make amends and  take responsibility.”

Two years ago when asked why his marriage had succeeded where so many others had failed? he obviously had seen the writing on the wall.

“We have been married ten years now,” he told me,”and all I can say is we have lived our lives and gone through those ten years one day at a time. We both know that God only hands them down one day at a time. We don’t look ahead. We don’t try to figure out what’s coming next year or next week or next month. We only deal with the day that we’re given, today, and having a good time today.”

What happened to his belief in God?

“I’m not a religious person. I consider myself a spiritual person.But I believe that more people have been killed in the name of God  than in  all wars combined. My children know there’s something out there, whether you call it God or Allah or Buddha, it is bigger than our comprehension. I teach my children that. It’s more spiritual than religious. Religion kind of lost it when we figured out all the scientific facts. And for a long time religion has been about money and the acquisition of money. I won’t name the religion. I’m sure you can figure out which one I’m talking about. A lot of money has been swindled from people in the name of God, and I’m pretty sure if there is a God, that’s not what he would want.” 

If there was one thing he could have in his life, what would that be?

“I’d like my privacy back, my anonymity, which has been taken away from me forever. I can’t imagine a situation unless I move to Tibet where I will ever be able to move around in public the way other people are able to. I don’t curse the gods about it, but I’d like to get to a point where I could just throw a switch and become a private citizen again, not that it’s ever going to happen.”

AND TWO YEARS LATER — after 9/ll

Because of his films like Die Hard and The Jackal, Bruce Willis has been held personally accountable for the recent terrorist acts.

Of course the idea is preposterous, but immediately following the attack on the World Trade Center, the airing of an hour long TV interview with him was canceled, and Hollywood quickly pushed back three of its September releases.

His latest Bandits is not one of them, and it is opening on schedule.

At his press conference for the film, at the Four Seasons Hotel in Beverly Hills,  the spectre of the World Trade Centre hangs heavily over the room.

Is he prepared to talk about it?

“I’m here to talk about Bandits,” he answers. “It would be inappropriate for me to discuss what happened on September 11. There’s no way I could say anything about it without appearing glib or exploiting the tragedy.  Like everyone else, I was just shook up, but now is not the time to discuss it.”

Bandits is by no means an action movie; in fact it’s a hilarious comedy in which he’s teamed with Billy Bob Thornton and Cate Blanchett under the skillful direction by Barry Levinson.

So let’s talk about Bruce.

The perception of who he is, how different is it  from the real Bruce Willis?

“People make up their minds about me based on what they see in films and what they read in magazines. But those things are not really who I am. There’s a big difference  between who I am as a man and who they see as an actor.”

So who is he?

“I’m a father. I’m a good friend. I try to live my life as a good man.”

Hardly the perception  most people have of him.

As someone long been identified with right wing causes, how does he feel about going to war?

“Since World War 2, which was the last clearly defined conflict, it’s been hard to distinguish between good and evil. Subsequent wars seem to be stuck in politics; they have much more to do with things like oil and natural resources  than the forces of good trying to overcome the forces of extreme evil.”

Is that  why he didn’t campaign for George Bush?

“I’ve never considered myself a hardline Republican. I’m a Republican because I favor smaller government, less government intrusion in the lives of people, lower taxes, less bull shit in the Congress. But at the same time I support Democratic ideas like taking care of the elderly. I think everybody over 65 should get free medicine. I believe in funding schools, having the best  teachers and educators. I believe in taking care of people who can’t take care of themselves. I also believe in overhauling the foster care system; it’s a crime what’s happening to over half a million kids every year in the United States.”

Even his playboy image is not what it appears,

Since  the breakup of his ten year marriage to Demi Moore, three years ago, he’s was seen with numerous beautiful women. 

But the next evening, when he shows up at the premiere of Bandits, he’s accompanied not by Maria Bravo or Emily Sandberg but by his three beautiful daughters and their mother Demi Moore.

The divorce was finalized last year, but neither has remarried. 

When asked, Bruce maintains that he’s not in a relationship.

In Bandits, the character played by Cate Blanchett  falls in love with both Billy Bob and him — “Together you’re the perfect man,” she tells them.

Could he find the perfect women in two women?

Facetiously he replies, “It’s an interesting concept, but I haven’t been fortunate enough to narrow it down to two. I see different things in all women. And I’ve never been one to wish for things. You can wish all you like, but then you have to deal with reality.”

Does he appreciate women more now than when he was young?

“I’m as baffled by women now as I ever was. I’ve given up trying to to understand them. I just accept them for how they are, good and bad. I try to accept men the same way. On a daily basis I’m trying to remove judgment from my life. I’m not always successful, but I recognize it as the source of so much conflict.”

Is he less romantic?

“As much as I’d like to tell you I’m not romantic, somewhere in my heart romance still lives. When I was younger I was caught up in the mythology of romance, the mythology that tells you there’s only one person for you, that love conquers all. But now I have a little more wisdom, and I can separate reality from myth.”  

Does he still believe in marriage?

“It certainly is an interesting experiment. And it’s important If you’re going to have kids, because kids need both role models. But my feeling leans more to the fact that statistically the majority of people have a series of relationships. Life is made up of  relationships. Some include marriage, the time when they are married. Some can be very short. Some very long. Some can be very passionate, some without passion. Statistically that’s what happens. I know there are people that stay together with one person for the rest of their lives, but I doubt if I’ll ever get married again.”

What about his responsibility as a parent?

“I accept that  fully. Raising children is the hardest thing in the world but it’s also the most rewarding. Your job is to teach kids right from wrong. If someone were to ask me, how I think of myself, I would say first as a dad and second as an actor. I’ve never understood men who bring children in the world and then walk away from that. I think that’s a crime. I have three daughters and I could not imagine ever walking away from them, never seeing them again nor taking responsibility for them. I just love being around my kids. I get a big kick out of hanging around with them.” 

How does he handle separation?

“I try to not be away from them for more than ten days at a time when I’m working, which means I sometimes have to travel great distances, but I just got to do it. There have been times when I’ve been away as much as three weeks. And when that happens, I suffer from separation anxiety. I miss them terribly even though I e-mail them everyday and and stay in contact.”

All three of them appear in Bandits.

Whose idea was that, his or theirs?

“A little bit of both. The rules in our house is that they’re allowed to be in movies that either their mom or their dad is in, and this happened to be one that had parts for two young girls. My daughter Scout was cast because she has a very specific talent (for belching, which she does in the movie) and my daughter Tallulah is just adorable and that was her talent.” 

Will they allow them to be in other movies?

“No, we want them to be kids as long as they can.”

Will he allow them to dress provocatively, as some teenagers do?

“When I was going to school wearing bell bottom jeans that used to drag on the ground, my parents would give me hell about that and say I looked like a slob. But that was the look. So I don’t make any fashion judgments. I don’t understand how kids dress today, but that’s not their problem, it’s my problem.  I would never tell them you can’t express yourself through your clothing, You can’t do that.”

Does he encourage them to be feminine and do girl things?

“We’ve never raised our children to believe women do certain things and men other things. Both Demi and I have always taught our girls to have self esteem, to know that what they say is important because for thousands of years women have taken a second place to men. So we’ve gone out of our way to dispel that myth.”

What has he learned from his kids?

“They have enabled me to stop being so selfish, to stop thinking only about myself, to stop thinking about what I want, what I need.”

Does he have good memories of his own father?

“My father was a hero to me. I grew up in a situation where I was surrounded by a lot of men, not only my father, but his brothers, and his father. They all lived within a few miles of each other so I grew up with a lot of male role models.”

Can he remember the moment he decided to become an actor?

“I guess it was when I was a kid. I used to stutter very badly. But then the first time I got on a stage, I realized I didn’t stutter. That was a huge revelation and I kept trying it. When I was on stage, I didn’t stutter.  Off stage I would. But I have to tell you, acting is fun. For me it’s artistic expression. If I could paint, that would be my artistic expression. If I could make sculptures, I’d do that. If I could write poetry, I’d do that. But I don’t have any other form to do it in, so acting is it.”

Where does he see his career going?

“I don’t look at my work in terms of a career. Some actors do; I don’t.  My goal is to have an many different colors as I can, so what’s said about each individual film when it comes out , good or bad, is not as important to me as the body of work I will end up with.”

Would he like to direct?

“I would probably do okay as a director even though it’s a real hard job and it takes too long. It’s a more difficult task than anyone realizes. But so far I haven’t found a story I’d want to spend two years of my life on.” 

For the record, he once had this to say about  violence in the media:

“A lot has been said about the impact of violence in films.  While we would all like to think of ourselves as human beings, we are simply at the top of the food chain. We are far closer to the animal kingdom than anyone would like to admit. I’m sure we’d all like to think that everyone on this planet has some connection with the concept of right and wrong, but there are many, many people who live their lives with no consideration of that. No one learns anything he’s not willing to learn or not ready to learn.  My criteria for acting in films is to entertain. The movie I appear in should  be interesting, watchable, and not be boring. Those are my only criteria. I’m not in the business of trying to teach people anything.”