Mark Wahlberg – Twenty years ago when he was contemplating fatherhood

                                 June 2004 By Philip Berk

All his life Mark Wahlberg has gambled and won.

After serving a jail sentence as a teenager, he reinvented himself as Marky Mark and became the first white rapper to have a platinum album.

A lucrative contract with Calvin Klein followed and his muscular physique was displayed on billboards from coast to coast.

Realizing that his fortune was still controlled by the record company that had signed him (as Marky Mark) he reverted back to his given name, and stopped recording and modeling.

As Mark Wahlberg, he reinvented himself this time as an actor. He was quickly cast in movies, gaining notice in Danny DeVito’s Renaissance Man and Leonardo De Caprio’s The Basketball, graduating to a starring roles in Fear (opposite a young Reese Witherspoon,)

But it was the role as a porn star in Boogie Nights that established him as a future star.

After that he did two movies with George Clooney — the blockbuster The Perfect Storm and the critically acclaimed Three Kings —  and George became his friend and mentor, advising him on his career.

He was right in recommending the remake of Planet of the Apes, which did blockbuster business.

But wrong with Rock Star and the remake of Charade, The Truth About Charlie, which were both resounding flops.

Suddenly Mark’s career was in  tailspin.

But unexpectedly it  rebounded when yet another remake The Italian Job became a surprise hit.

In spite of its success, he decided to take time off, ostensibly to await the birth of his first child.

A year later at a hastily convened press conference in Beverly Hills, he’s a little cockier than  he was the last time we interviewed him in New York.

And for good reason.

As  producer of a new TV series for HBO Entourage  — it’s based on his own Hollywood experiences — he has a hit on his hands.

And as an actor he’s earning rave reviews for I Heart Huckabees, an ensemble Existential comedy that’s confounding everyone by finding an audience

A year ago, when he was in New York to promote The Italian Job, all he would talk about was his spiritual rebirth.

“It’s changed my life in so many ways.” he had told me.“I was raised Catholic, but growing up I was distracted by a lot of the things that were going on in and around my neighborhood. Until I refocused my faith, a lot of bad things were happening to me, but since, wonderful things have been happening not so much in my career but in my life. I am very grateful for that, and I try to influence as many people as possible to do the same.” 

By wonderful things he was referring to his impending fatherhood.

So setting Entourage and Huckabees aside, I have to ask him if he still attends Mass.

“Every Sunday,” is his sincere answer.

But he’s no longer with the mother of his child? 

“No we’re back together,” he contradicts me.

So much for tabloid reporting!

What type of father is he?

“I love my child. She’s tough to handle. Me and her mom have a little help from her mom once in a while. I’ve changed the diapers and done my part.”

How has it changed his life?

“I mean, everything just changes. A little person is relying on you to take care of them. It’s more scary and nerve-wracking when you’re not there. But she’s a great mom, and it’s a safe environment. It’s nerve wracking. I can’t focus on me anymore. I like to hang out with my daughter, swim, play golf, eat food. I don’t want it to be much more complicated than that.”

Do they live together?

“Right now they’re in Orlando (Florida) for anther forty days until the construction on the house is completed. I’ve certainly got to know her (meaning Rea Durham) a lot better. The hormonal roller-coaster that women experience after the birth of a child is something I had no idea about and certainly was not prepared for it in any way. I had heard echoes of, ‘Hey watch out for the post partum, but I was too busy paying attention to how amazing it was going to be and what it would be be like when it’s my own child as opposed to my nieces and nephews.”

So when does he intend to make his mom and his priest happy by getting married? I needle him.

“Right after Britney gets a divorce,” he jokes.

Then seriously he adds, “Probably the beginning of next year.” 

Why wait?

“It’s more important for us to be happy and in a healthy relationship. Not to get married because everybody else thinks it’s the right thing to do. I want to make sure it’s going to work. I look at the people who’ve had success in  relationships and marriage and try to use that guideline. I have a brother who met a girl and after nine months he was married and a year and a half later he was divorced. The rest of my brothers and sisters have been together for a long time . Some waited four or five years to be married and they’re very happy and very much in love, and with all the crazy stuff that goes around my life and career, I don’t want to mess things up. I don’t want to have to go visit my daughter two weeks a year. I don’t want somebody else in her life as a father figure. I want it to work so I’m focused on work for now and then I’ll focus on family.” 

So what can he tell us about the house that’s under construction?

“I finally bought a house here in L.A. but it still feels like I’ve moved into a hotel. I’m just staying longer this time. I feel a lot more comfortable when I go home to Boston. I feel at ease there. I don’t  think about the things I have to think about when I’m here wandering around the house.”

So it’s not being built from scratch, it’s being remodeled?

“Something like that.”

A year ago, before the hormonal changes, he seemed very much in love.

When Rea text-messaged him during that press conference: “Good morning, I love you,” he responded, “Oh she loves me. I’m a very lucky guy. I’ve never lived with a woman before, never mind a pregnant woman. My life has completely changed for the better.”

Was the pregnancy planned? I asked him.

“I’ve always wanted to have children. I’ve tried desperately to find the right person. It was something we planned, although not the particular day it happened.” 

Is his girl friend an actress?

“No she’s a supermodel. She has no interest in being an actress, and she’s a very, very sweet young lady.”

How did they meet?

“We met in New York through a mutual friend.”

Was it love at first sight?

“No no, the opposite. But eventually it turned to love.”

What does he mean by opposite?

“Just that it took a long time for us to develop. At first we were very apprehensive. We were a reluctant match. We were both a little hesitant. She had heard I had a past, but it just kind of grew.”

Was she the resistant one?

“Very, but I was persistent.” 

(He neglected to mention that they had dated two years earlier or that afterwards he had relationships with two other women, Frida Anderson, a Swedish model and Sofia Vergara. When asked about the latter, he answered, Sofia who?)

Was he disappointed when he found out it was going to be a girl?

“I was freaked out. I actually sat in the doctor’s office with my head down in my lap for thirty minutes. I was all prepared to have a boy, do all that boy stuff. But as my friend (Huckabees director) David O. Russell and his wife said to me, ‘You already know how to do that. This is not what life is about. This is a challenge that’s put before you.’ So now I am very excited.”

What was his mom’s reaction?

“My mom wished it on me. Because she thinks I was horrible to my ex-girlfriends, when she found out we were having a baby, she said ‘I hope you have a girl.’  I was like, ‘Mom why did you do that?’ ‘Because you need to suffer.’ ‘That’s nice. Really nice. I thought I was your son and you my mom. You are supposed to love me. ”

As the youngest of nine, he grew up in Boston. 

His dad was a Teamster and his mom worked to help support the family.

“We had a pretty tough time when we were younger. All my brothers and sisters went through phases of drugs and alcohol, getting in trouble and stuff like that. So by the time I showed up, my mom and dad were a little tired, so it was a lot easier for me to get away with certain things, until I had to pay the serious price when I got in trouble with the law.”

For doing what?

“Well, just lots of things, running around the streets, drugs, alcohol, shoplifting. Pretty much whatever the boys were doing I was right alongside them, but I realized I was going to end up like everybody else, so I made a decision to straighten out my act. It was hard, but it worked out for the best.”

He’s always been closer to his mother than his father especially after he deserted the family twenty years ago.

Yet when asked what he would do different as a father, he became surprisingly defensive.

“My dad was an incredible man. He always regrets not having been there enough for his kids, but he had to work every day of his life, to provide for us. My dad is my hero. He inspired me, and hopefully I can be as good a parent. Of course I will have the luxury of not having to work so hard. I’ll have a lot more time with them and be able to give them a lot more attention. But I really believe the mistakes I made growing up, I made on my own. I don’t think it would have been any different had my dad’s been around more. And I credit him for the person I’ve become.”

Two years ago he  made a commitment to give back to his community.

“I felt obligated to go back to the neighborhood I grew up in and help those kids. I want to inspire them, put them on the right track and show them through example.”

So what is he doing?

“I’m working with inner city kids. We do a lot of stuff. I have access to a lot of people who are rich, successful. I make them give money. We’re sending these kids to school. We’re building teen centres. We built a gym for the church. We’re doing whatever we can. We’re involved with the Boys’ and Girls’ Clubs of America. Some of these kids are kids of my friends, people I grew up with who are either in jail or on drugs.” 

Does the organization have a name?

“It’s called the Mark Wahlberg Youth Foundation. It’s run by one of my older brothers. We’ve done an event in Vegas, raising some money. We’ve done premieres.”

Is he still extorting money from Hollywood hot shots? I ask him.

“No doubt about it.”

Such as?

“Today on the golf course. I was playing with some heavy hitters. Anything I win gambling goes to the charity. We’re having a tournament in Boston benefiting the Boys Club. Every opportunity I get I try to hit somebody, but they never feel taken advantage of. They know it’s for a great cause.”

Is he still close to George Clooney?

“I was supposed to do this film called The Jacket which he was going to produce. It just kind of didn’t work out. We couldn’t cast the female that we wanted, and we didn’t think we could make the film we envisioned so I kind of stepped out, but we’re still buddies. We talk. But you got to go out on your own every once in a while. That was kinda my decision for not doing Oceans Eleven. We mutually agreed my name wouldn’t be mentioned around his, and vice versa. You’ve got to do your own thing.”

(For the record Matt Damon replaced him in Oceans Eleven, and The Jacket was made with Adrien Brody and Keira Knightley.)

Is it true he was scheduled to fly on one of the airplanes that crashed on 9/ll?

“Not exactly. I was in Boston two weeks before, and at one point I had a reservation on that flight and on another flight on the same day. But five or six days before, I changed my plans and went to New York.  I was in Toronto the morning of September 11.”

In Entourage a character modeled on him has a cousin who’s a failed actor.

Is he his brother Donnie?

“It was never not even close to being based on my brother.  My brother’s a huge success and has always had his own career and his own life and his own entourage.” 

Are they still close?

“We have a great relationship on a personal level. Early on there was a strain on the relationship because of business. We didn’t really know how to separate the two. We were excited to work together, but once money and contracts started coming into play, things got a little weird. Fortunately we realized our  relationship is more important, so we’ve put creative things aside. We don’t really talk about it that much.”

How does he feel about being the first white rapper?

“I was one of the first, but rap music is really a street thing, and although there are a lot more poor black kids out there than there are white kids, there are white kids living through the same thing. It was something that I grew up around and part of everyday life, so I had just as much right to rap as anybody else.” 

And now that he’s a successful producer, has he a moment to reflect on that?

“I always scratch my head and wonder how the hell did I get here, especially knowing how many kids I grew up with were just as talented, smart, and funny, and could bullshit their way in and out of trouble as good if not better than I could.”  

Is he surprised at how good a businessman he’s become?

“I’m surprised at how easy I was able to apply my street smarts into this business. I know when to pull my punches and when to throw a punch. It’s funny to think how similar it is. Hollywood is a lot more pretty on the outside but much more dangerous and cut throat, that’s for sure.”

What’s with this obsession with golf? 

“God, it was a big decision I had to make when I was having a baby. Is it going to be the nightclub or the country club?  And I told my girl, I said, ‘There’s no pretty girls on the golf course, so you ain’t got to worry about that.’ 

What’s so satisfying about it?

“I just find it so relaxing. challenging but relaxing. You kind of leave the phone and everything for four hours. You’re out there in nature. It’s beautiful. I’ve met so many interesting people since I started playing, and you can play it at any age. The first thing I’m going to do with my daughter is put a golf club in her hand,  a great way to spend quality time with her.” 

In I Heart Huckabees he hires an existential therapist. Is he in therapy and does he have a psychiatrist?

“My parish priest does the job for me. I don’t need to go further than that.”

And to prove how close he is to his religion, when asked what music he listens to his surprising answer is, “I listen to (a religious station) KJLA on Sunday on my way to church in the morning. And then when I’m going to dinner they have gospel and some pretty interesting Bible discussions.”