Kevin Smith – Fifteen years ago he clashed with me in an X rated interview

Julu 2008 By Philip Berk

Kevin Smith didn’t get the joke when I suggested he’d put on the weight Seth Rogan has lost. 

For someone capable of emitting an endless stream of witty remarks, he sure is overly sensitive.

“I call myself fat all the time too,” he admonishes me. “Good morning, you’re fat. I’m like fuck already. I think that deserves a Golden Globe nod right there. I think I’ve earned it. Yes.”

When he calms down I ask him, So when were you first exposed to porn?

“First time I ever saw a porno? I was at a family friend’s hose, this woman my parents are friendly with, she’s a divorcee. they went out to pickup pizza and left me home to watch the dog; so while I was doing that I rifled though her VHs collection. This was just at the advent of the VCR. She was one of the first people I’d ever known with a VCR so I’m looking at all the tapes that she had recorded of soap operas and TV shows, and there was one tape in the drawer that was in a TDK box and had the sticker on the spine ripped off but you can still see a remnant of it. It looked very professional so immediately I was drawn to it. Popped it in,  that’s when i saw my first porno. Don’t remember the title. Just remember very vividly that they had sex in a pool including the cum shot which was in the pool, and that was very strange for me to see because I was twelve years old. First time I ever saw insertion, first time i ever saw sex in a pool, last time I wold ever see sex in a pool. And then the other thing that really stuck out was the whole score was done on a kazoo so when I would have sex after that and every time since, sooner 0r later whatever I’m fucking I always hear a kazoo in the back of my head. That was my first experience.”

How do you see the industry — it seems that  the only thing the public is buying is Superhero comic strips movies.

“You’re talking to a card carrying member of the comic book community so I’m happy to see more comic book movies. More importantly I’m happy to see them done well, like we saw this year The Dark Knight Iron Man and even The Incredible Hulk. which I really enjoyed this summer. I’m all for it. I’m all for comic book movies particularly if it’s done well. My relationship to the movie industry has always been a little bit different than most people  because our moves have always had like a ceiling — I’ve never made more than $30 million at the box office. Our stuff has always been more cult oriented and for years I always assumed if you were going to mix raunch with sweetness, you could never get higher than 30 million. We were the only ones doing it since 94. Then Judd and company come along and shatter the glass ceiling and suddenly they make the kind of movies I enjoy making financially viable. So it was no problem getting this movie financed. I sat down with Harvey (Weinstein) at the Peninsula Hotel and we were talking about Clerks 2 business and he said what do you want to do next, and I said I was thinking about making a movie called Zach and Miri make a Porno, and he goes, done. green lit, and I was, Don’t you want to know what it’s about. He’s like C’mon doesn’t the title say it all? And I was like, ‘Well i hope not. So  it worked out for me, but right now even though comic book movies are the big earners and everyone will go out and see them, and even dramas are kind of falling by the wayside. R rated comedy is huge right now and that’s the comedy I’ve enjoyed making since 94 so I’m kinda in the catbird seat. Will it mean we’re gonna do better box office than we’ve done before. I hope so. We certainly have all the cards in our favor. The reviews seem very positive, people seem to really like the movie. Audiences seem to like it. Hopefully it pans out but if not I’m just as content to make little moves that nobody ever sees.”

What does Hollywood mean to him?

Growing up I never really thought about Hollywood or movies as a viable career choice because it always seemed that movies were made in Hollywood by people who were born into the industry or super famous. It wasn’t until I saw Richard Linklater’s Slacker in 1971 that suddenly I was like Omigod, if this counts as a film, I want to make a film too. But I never want to work in Hollywood. I’ve always been a fan of movies. I mean obviously I am not athletically inclined so I didn’t play sports. I sat around watched a lot of movies, and it panned out later in life.”

What were your favorite movies?

A Man  for All Seasons is one of my favorite movies I am still a huge Paul Scofield fan. I also love JFK, Jaws, Do the Right Thing, Last Temptation of Christ; so obviously flicks that aren’t anything like the  movies i make.”